Blessings Amongst the Tiredness

There is so much I take for granted:

Leaving my kids in the car with my husband while I go grab a few groceries.

Not thinking about taking the trash out on Monday mornings, because Rich does it before he goes to work.

Having some time during each weekend when I can sleep, without having to be on Mommy Duty, because Rich takes over.

Not worrying about our business, because I know Rich is there every day, leading it.

I’m having to let go of a lot of the things I’ve taken for granted, as I search for a new normal.

My guaranteed points of rest in the week are looking different, these days. The little pockets of space that are mine for my own thoughts simply haven’t existed for awhile. Though the cancer diagnosis is only a few days old, Rich has been sick for awhile. And the sickness is just beginning.

We went to Kaiser again yesterday…this time for Asher, who still had an  ear infection…his fourth round of antibiotics were prescribed. The kids were remarkably naughty in the doctor’s office, and the doctor didn’t quite believe me when I said that they reserve their worst behaviors for her.

Allison is always thinking up new games she wants me to partake in (catching ladybugs; going on spider patrol (where I remove the spiders from her swingset with a stick); catching crickets for her bug box). She is busy, and thoughtful and full of so many, many words. Words that require a response…or the words repeat…until they get a response.

I went into this afternoon exhausted. I put Asher down for a nap, and then finally had a piece of time to myself. The house was wonderfully, blissfully quiet. I snuggled up on the couch and fell asleep reading my Bible. I knew God wouldn’t mind…He was the one who made that moment for me.

Asher slept 4 hours.

Allison slept for 2 hours, and then was content to just do her own thing while I slowly emerged from my groggy sleep.

Amazing grace.

Besides my tiredness, we’ve been amazingly fed this weekend. Yesterday, I saw my good friend Bobbie, who lives far away. I never see her…she happened to be coming to our area to see her mom this weekend, and I got to spend some time with her.

A friend brought us a meal and beautiful flowers. I had just thrown out some old flowers, and thought…hmmm…I need to buy some more….but who knows when I’ll get to the store to do that? Then they appeared at our door!

My mom came over bearing gifts of calorie-dense peanuts and cashews for Rich, and Hershey Kisses for me.

Last night, our good friend Eric came over to pray with us. Today we saw Dave, another good friend we hadn’t seen in awhile, and he and Rich hung out and talked for a few hours…and then a few of my girlfriends came over. They are kind of friends you can just be yourself with…we all have little kids; we are all in the same point in life in so many ways. They are such blessings to me, and I was so thankful to have them come over to talk and pray with me.

Another girlfriend took my Costco shopping list with her to Fresno, and picked up the various things we ALWAYS buy from there…string cheese, graham crackers…staples in a house with 2 little kids.

Our home has become somewhat of a revolving door…people coming and going, bringing their blessings. Leaving us feeling loved and filled. I’m not so worried anymore about it being immaculately clean, or even picked up…it’s just about being with friends.

As I stood in the shower tonight, I was taking a mental inventory of the blessings and challenges of the day. Besides the fact that Rich has cancer, all I came up with was blessings…and they were all a result of our family and friends reaching out to us because of the cancer.

Rich’s pain has been less the last few days. Yesterday he did an experiment with Vicodin and took less than the prescribed amount, and did OK with it. He’s been eating more. His spirits are high. He has been able to sit up for long periods on our couch, which he couldn’t do earlier in the week. We are feeling your prayers in so many tangible ways these days…it’s truly amazing.

Thank you so much for loving us and supporting us. We love you!

Susan

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One Response to “Blessings Amongst the Tiredness”

  1. Erik Says:

    I only know Rich from Calguns and Tagoria, but I’m glad to know him even via the internet.
    I just lost my Dad to cancer last Tuesday and had the memorial Sunday, so this really hits home.
    Rich – You and your family will be in our family’s prayers.

    Erik (emc002)

    Romans 5:1-5
    Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

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